the shepherd

October 25, 2020

Hi world,

Today I embarked on some relatively deep soul-searching with Annie.

I realise that a lot of my daily activities revolve around building and branding myself as an artist because I want to perform full-time. I want to turn my music and acting into a financially sustainable career (that can also pay for my rent when I eventually move out). I want to grow my social media following to a point where I am able to make a significant positive impact in my community and in society. I want to share freely the challenges that I've faced growing up and the lessons that I've learnt along the way. I want to teach others that there is strength in their vulnerability and that it is beautiful to be raw, honest and authentic in their interactions with the people around them.

I am aware that it starts with me first understanding the people in my immediate surroundings i.e. my family.

I have also come to acknowledge that different people have different ideas of love and what it means to be in a relationship. At the end of the day, we're all on our own journey of self-discovery, moving toward self-awareness and becoming fully conscious. Therefore I cannot expect others (e.g. my partner) to be constantly walking beside me. Each of us will blossom at our own time and in our own unique way. If a relationship has to end, just ask yourself: "What am I thankful for?" and "What have I learnt?"

As long as I've given myself sufficient time to reflect and figure out my answers to those two questions, I know that the relationship (whether mostly healthy or not) would be more than worth it. Sometimes life teaches us painful lessons, but they're also priceless. I believe that relationships are meant to help us grow whether or not we end up growing apart or together.

Each time I have a conversation with Annie, I am constantly gaining new insights into my life, my work, my values, my priorities and my character. I can't thank you more, Lord, for placing her in my life as a shepherd to guide me toward greener pastures. I will continue learning, growing and striving to be a servant of Your people, making full use of the gifts that You've given me.

Amen.